Repressed and Rebels

Opening Mood: Good Morning, and I’m still grumpy
Opening Song: None.

I saw him at the coffee house yesterday. It’s been more than a year since we last met. He hasn’t changed a bit. Dressed in a loose T-shirt and a pair of faded jeans, he looked casual as ever. He saw me and the next moment, he was at my table. So typical of him, I thought!

“Wassup dude! Howz life? How’s that Linux thing of yours goin on?” , he asked.

I told him about my work, and the interesting stuff that was happening there. He listened to all of it with great interest.

“So, it’s not t O(1) anymore, eh?! Nice. Will check that out sometime.” He said.

I asked him about his work, and life.

“Going on! I am enjoying it. Nothing to do with what we studied back in college. But doing good.”

I felt happy for him. Finally the chap had found something which has managed to hold his attention for this long. Good for him!

“I’ll be quitting next week. There’s this other cool thing I read about the other day. Will be working on it!”

I guess he loved the expression on my face, when he said that. Because he gave me that wicked smile.I asked him if he had any definite plan about this other thing.

“Nope! It’s still in a very nascent stage. Will fiddle with it for a while.”

I really couldn’t believe it!

This is one of those people who has real potential to change the world. Instead of realizing it, here he was “Wandering! Yup, that I am. And I like it. I feel extremely light.”

Fear of the C-word?, I asked him.

“Not at all! It’s just the futility of commitment. I don’t see the point in it. Simply cannot understand how can I make a promise to accomplish something, when there may be thousands of interesting things on the way. I can’t just ‘let-go’ of these things. I will be interested in stopping and having a look around. And may be, one of these things’ll drive me on a different path, which may never meet the first one. And, I don’t wanna keep anyone waiting for me!”

I gave a puzzled look that demanded further explanation.

“Dude, I don’t want to be defined by some one thing that I do in life. I’ve seen it happen before. You show your interest in something, and people around you create an image, associating you with that thing. And in course of time, you yourself accept that image, and feed it further. One fine day, when you discover something else which is “fun”, the same people tell you that the “fun” thing doesn’t fit your image or it’s extrapolations. And thus, you automatically become a member of the society’s “Repressed or Rebels Club”. The moment you let something define you, you are enslaved by an obligation to do well in that. Sometimes it happens without your knowledge. And you start thinking – ‘But this is what I wanted to do all the while! So I should be happy.’ Just that my idea of happiness isn’t preceded by conditionals.”

I started laughing. I understood what he was talking about. I got up. This meeting was over.

He was still sitting there, smiling.

I paid our bill, picked up my stuff, plugged in my iPod and bid him adieu. Led Zep’s voice filled my brain.

Stairway to the heaven. Man, people sure *do* wanna buy that thing! I started walking back home.

Yes there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run.
There’s still time to change the road you’re on.

Closing Song: None.
Closing Mood: Wide awake.